I don't know if some of you know this, but the Jelly Belly company got together with who ever is in charge of Harry Potter stuff and made the actual Bertie Bott's jelly beans. I never read the books, but I remember them being mentioned by Dumbledore in the first movie. I found them at Borders and decided to buy a box, just for kicks and giggles.

Now for those of you who don't know, there are some strange flavors in this box. I haven't tasted the gross ones yet and I thought it would be fun to write down what I think of each flavor as eat them. This should be a laugh!

1. Black Pepper- Oh gosh... my mouth is actually burning! Hot pepper! Ack! Hot! *reaches for milk* Ewww... that was bad. But not intolerable. It just tasted like food with way too much pepper. I give this bean two out of five pukes.

2. Booger- It's like a mixture of sugar, salt, fish, and wax. I'd hate to know whose boogers taste like this! They must be one sick person. Overall, I'd give this three out of five pukes.

3. Dirt- Ewwww! This seriously tastes like dirt! I remember tasting dirt as a kid and now I realized why I never did again! This one gets three out of five pukes.

4. Earthworm- Oh... gross! Think of dirt, grass, sugar, and garbage and you get this flavor! Ack! Nasty! This one is a four!

5. Earwax- It's like sour eggnog! It's salty too! Ack! But it's not as bad as you would think. It gets a three.

6. Grass- It actually doesn't taste much like grass. It's actually more like soft grapes, just with less sugar. It's not that bad. This one is only one puke.

7. Pickle- Ewww!!!! It's like dumping sugar all over a really salty pickle! I don't like pickles to begin with, but this is just terrible! Four pukes definitely!

8. Rotton Egg- This is the first one I actually spat back out! Oh god! Oh god! The taste is still in my mouth! This is discussing! I keep drinking stuff, but it won't go away! Five pukes! Five pukes!

Ten minutes later...

Sorry... had to recover... Moving on.

9. Sardine- Oh god!!!!!! *spits out bean and gags over and over* Oh good lord! That was bad too! They just keep getting worse and worse! Salty, sugary, rotton fish! Another five pukes!

Another ten minutes later...

*burps* Moving on... again.

10. Sausage- Ack! This is pretty bad too. It's like lukewarm lunch meat with sugar. Only worse! This is a definite four pukes.

11. Soap- Good lord! It's like soap, shampoo, and Windex! It even has the chemically taste like when you get shampoo in your mouth while showering. But since I tend to do that a lot, I'm use to the taste. This gets two pukes.

And last but not least... the grand-daddy of them all...

12. VOMIT!!!- AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! *spits out bean and vomits in trash can* I ain't kidding! I actually threw up a little in my mouth after spitting this one out! That has got to be the worst thing I've ever put in my mouth! Good lord! This one's off the charts! Oh my gosh! I'm gonna be sick!!!!! Seven pukes!!!!!

Two hours later...

Ehhhh... *hiccup* I still feel a little woosy, but I think I'm gonna be okay. I hope you all enjoyed that because I'm never buying another box of these nasty beans again! Now I know why Dumbledore never ate them again after tasting vomit flavor! Alright, move along people, nothing to see here....


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